Thursday, April 24, 2008

Are You There God? It's Me, Rex

The King of Carnival, the Monarch of Merriment, Rex, is stranded on a remote Pacific Island known as Palmyra Atoll. New Orleanians are freaking out. Nobody has seen Comus for two days, but with the Boeuf Gras float missing and an a case of empty champagne bottles at the Algiers Ferry dock, it's obvious what happened. And then Mickey Easterling purchased 200 pairs of clean white tights, but the Shrimp Arnaud she sent along stained them. Word is Rex had to go all Gilligan's Island and make a crown out of a Zulu coconut and a scepter out of a page's femur bone. He's gone three days without a makeup change, and he even briefly caught on fire after a Flambeaux dropped the last of his crack cocaine in Rex's cape. So God, please take care of our Rex. He's so helpless, and so afraid, and New Orleans needs him. Please God, please......


Leigh C. said...

You mean, Rex had to go all Zulu on the island? Bummer! At least he is TRULY the ruler of his own piddly realm.

This is making me laugh loud and long, by the way.

Anonymous said...

All we can do is pray, and hope that the City could survive without royalty.egacss

Anonymous said...


I usually take great issue with your attacks on this aspect of our City's culture and usually attribute your bad attitude to your rearing in Nebraska.

I have to admit your comments here made me laugh. Only in New Orleans could our media latch on to a story like this with the same zeal as the media did when that poor little baby fell down the well years ago.

Regardless of what you think, Johnny's a great guy that came from meager beginnings and can still "walk with Kings" without losing touch with the common man. After all, he was just out for a bone fishing trip.


Michael Homan said...

Thanks JBS. I don't know anything about Johnny or any other Rex for that matter. It's difficult for me to imagine them as real people, but of course, they are.