Monday, March 03, 2008

New Readers from Congo: Stop Eating Magical Pygmies!

I've been thinking quite a bit about cannibalism lately. This first came about as I've been watching many prehistoric movies lately in preparation for seeing the movie 10,000 BC. Movies like Clan of the Cavebear and Quest for Fire portray the most primitive humans as cannibals, whereas the more advanced groups, the ones that are less hairy, find that eating people is repulsive. I guess I'm sort of on the fence about eating people. As a kid I was infatuated about the story "Alive", where the rugby team had to eat people to survive after plane crash. And what kid doesn't love to reenact the story of the Donner Party? I'm sure I would have done the same, as you can tell just by looking at me and my full-figured belly that I like to eat.

Well, it turns out now that some of this blogs newest readers, my friends from the Democratic Republic of Congo and the Republic of Congo, have been eating their pygmy neighbors claiming that the little pygmies have magical powers that can be obtained through ingestion. Chasing short people for food reminds me of those pesky kids chasing the Lucky Charms leprechaun trying to eat his marshmallow clovers.
Lucky Charms
And this all makes me wonder if somewhere out there, right now, there is a pygmy running away from a cannibal and shouting "They're always after me lucky ARMS."

Sometimes I'm ashamed of myself.


Anonymous Adrastos said...

Bite me, Homan. Oh second thought, I'd prefer that you not bite.

Your opening sentence was a classic. I, too, have a Donner party fixation that comes from growing up in California.

3:02 PM  
Blogger mominem said...

Why don't you have a Donner a Party?

3:44 PM  
Blogger Leigh C. said...

I think I'm gonna die laughing. Then they can all eat me and leave the pygmies alone for a while.

6:42 PM  
Blogger Mark said...

Donner Party, your table is ready... I'm not sure I could coax my wife into attending a party themed around either the Donner Party or the hockey team. I think we could get Peter's particular friend to whoop up a nutria etouffe that could be passed off as long pig.

1:05 PM  
Blogger Sue said...

The Donner Party is soooooo passe. You should be reading up on Alfred Packer's buffet of his fellow travelers. Univ. of Colorado's food court in the Student Union is named after him.

10:30 PM  
Blogger GENTILLY YARD ART said...

poke salad annie alliligator ate your grannie . chomp.

12:19 AM  
Anonymous Dr. A said...

Since you like cannibalism stories, the Kuru story is really interesting:

11:00 AM  

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